with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
