i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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