So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
