Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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