I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
