No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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