we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize