If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
