Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i just google imaged poop.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
