Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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