yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize