just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize