so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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