That's intense
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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