So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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