thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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