Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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