Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
