good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
