this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
