There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
