im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize