you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
