i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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