but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize