I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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