I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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