Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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