6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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