haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
