I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Randomize