Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
