I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My life is pants optional.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
