AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
