her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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