Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
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