Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Sponge bath it is.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
