Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
