You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Randomize
