how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
