is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Are we still banned from the library?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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