now i know why i became what i already was.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
