I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Just high enough for therapy.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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