Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
