seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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