what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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