YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize