Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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