Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
