I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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