what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
